How to Ask for a Raise When You're Terrified to Bring It Up

You don't need a speech. You need three things: proof of what you've done, a number that's fair, and one sentence to open the conversation. Walk in, say "I'd like to talk about my pay," lay out your case in under two minutes, and let your boss respond. That's it. The rest of this post shows you exactly how.

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You Already Know You Deserve It. That's Not the Problem.

You've been showing up. Covering shifts nobody else wants. Training the new people even though nobody asked you to and nobody pays you extra for it. Staying late. Picking up slack. Doing two people's jobs since Marcia left and they never replaced her.

And your pay? Same as the day you started. Or close enough that it stings.

You know you need to ask. You've thought about it in the shower, on the drive home, lying in bed at 11pm running the conversation in your head. But the thought of actually sitting in front of your boss and saying the words makes your stomach flip.

So you keep putting it off. Another week. Another month. Another year of doing more for the same paycheck.

You're not being dramatic. And you're not alone. A 2024 Payscale survey found that 57% of workers who have never negotiated their pay said they didn't do it because they were uncomfortable bringing it up. Not because they didn't deserve it. Because the conversation itself felt too scary.

Here's the thing. That fear is costing you real money. And the conversation is way less painful than you think it's going to be. For more on dealing with all the nonsense that comes with work problems, we've got a full guide.

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Why Asking for a Raise Feels Like Asking for a Favor (and Why It's Not)

Let's talk about why this feels so hard. Because it's not the same kind of hard as doing a presentation or making a phone call you've been avoiding.

When you ask for a raise, your brain treats it like you're putting yourself at risk. You're telling someone who controls your schedule, your shifts, and your paycheck that what they're giving you isn't enough. For your brain, that feels dangerous. What if they get mad? What if they think you're ungrateful? What if they start looking for a reason to let you go?

Those fears feel real. But they're almost never what actually happens.

Here's what actually happens: your boss either says yes, says not right now, or says let me think about it. That's it. Nobody gets fired for asking for a raise in a normal, professional way. And most managers have had this conversation before. It's not the shock you think it is.

The discomfort you're feeling isn't a sign that you're doing something wrong. It's a sign that this matters to you. Big difference.

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When to Ask for a Raise (and When to Hold Off)

Timing matters. Not because the conversation needs to be perfect, but because catching your boss at the right moment makes a yes more likely.

Good times to ask:

• After you've had a clear win. You finished a project, got a compliment from a customer, or handled something big. Your value is fresh in their mind.
• During your annual review. This is literally what reviews are for. If your company does them, use them.
• When the company is doing well. New contracts coming in. Busy season. Expansion talk. Money is flowing and morale is up.
• After you've taken on new responsibilities. You got trained on a new machine, started handling scheduling, took over ordering. Your job got bigger but your pay didn't.
• During budget planning season. Usually Q4 or Q1. This is when managers are deciding where next year's money goes.

Bad times to ask:

• Right after layoffs or budget cuts. Read the room.
• When your boss is having a terrible day. You want their attention, not their frustration.
• Right after you made a mistake. Give it a couple of weeks. Let a win happen first.
• During a crisis. If the building is on fire, figuratively speaking, wait until the smoke clears.

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How to Build Your Case (Even if Your Job Doesn't Have "Measurable Results")

This is where people get stuck. Every article on how to negotiate a raise says "bring data" and "show your results." That's great if you're in sales and can point to a revenue number. But what if you're a CNA, a warehouse worker, or a front desk person? What results? You showed up and did your job. That IS the result.

Here's how to build a case when your work doesn't come with a spreadsheet.

Write down everything extra you've done.

Not your job description. The stuff beyond it. The stuff they'd notice if you stopped doing it tomorrow.

Maria works as a CNA at a nursing home. Her job description says patient care. But she also:

• Trained three new hires in the last six months
• Covered 12 extra shifts when two people quit
• Got requested by name by three different residents' families
• Took over the supply ordering when nobody else would

None of that shows up on a spreadsheet. All of it shows up in a raise conversation.

Look up what the job pays.

Go to Indeed, Glassdoor, or the Bureau of Labor Statistics and search for your job title in your area. If you're making $17/hour and the average is $20, that's a number you can bring to the table. You're not being greedy. You're being informed.

Write down how long it's been.

If you haven't gotten a raise in over a year, say so. Inflation alone has eaten into your paycheck. According to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, prices have gone up over 20% since 2020. If your pay hasn't moved, you're making less than you were three years ago in real terms. That's a fact, not a complaint.

Keep it on one page.

You don't need a PowerPoint. You need a list on your phone or a piece of paper:

• How long you've been there
• What you do beyond your job description
• What the market rate is
• What you're asking for (a specific number or percentage)

That's your whole case.

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What to Say When You Ask for a Raise: 8 Phrases That Actually Work

OK. Here's the part you came for. The actual words.

You don't need to memorize a speech. You need an opening line, a few sentences for your case, and a response ready for each direction the conversation might go.

Opening the conversation:

"Hey, do you have a few minutes this week? I'd like to talk about my compensation."

That's it. Don't apologize. Don't say "I know this is awkward." Don't over-explain. Ask for the meeting, show up, and get into it.

If you want something a little softer:

"I've been wanting to have a conversation about my pay. When's a good time for you?"

Presenting your case:

"I've been here for [time], and my responsibilities have grown a lot since I started. I'm now handling [specific examples]. I've looked at what this role pays in our area, and I'd like to discuss bringing my pay in line with that."

Real example: David works in a warehouse. He's been there two years. He started on the floor pulling orders. Now he trains new hires, runs the forklift, and covers the lead when she's out. Here's what he said:

"I've been here two years and my role looks a lot different than when I started. I'm training new people, running the forklift, and covering for Sheila when she's out. I looked up what this kind of work pays, and I'd like to talk about getting my rate adjusted."

Short. Specific. No begging.

If they say "We don't have the budget right now":

"I understand that. Can we put a date on the calendar to revisit this? And can you let me know what would need to happen for a raise to be possible?"

This does two things. It pins them down on a timeline (so "not right now" doesn't turn into "never"). And it makes them tell you the criteria, so you can meet it.

If they say "Let me think about it":

"Sure, I appreciate that. Can we set a follow-up for next week so I know where things stand?"

"Let me think about it" without a deadline is how raise conversations die. You're not being pushy. You're being clear.

If they try to change the subject:

"I hear you, and I'm happy to talk about that too. But I'd like to finish this conversation about my pay first."

Sometimes bosses will pivot to something else. A project that's due. A problem on the floor. Your attendance record from six months ago. Gently pull it back.

If they say "You should be grateful you have a job":

"I am grateful. That's why I've been working hard and taking on more. I'm asking because I want to keep doing that, and I want my pay to reflect the work I'm doing."

This one stings when you hear it. But it's not an argument. It's a deflection. Don't take the bait. Redirect to your case.

If they offer less than you asked for:

"I appreciate the offer. Can I take a day to think about it?"

You don't have to accept the first number on the spot. Taking a day is normal. It's not a power move. It's giving yourself time to decide if the offer is fair or if you want to counter.

Asking for a specific timeline:

"If a raise isn't possible right now, can we agree on a review date? I'd like to know what I'm working toward."

Danielle works as a retail associate. She asked for a raise, and her manager said the next round of increases would be in six months. Danielle said: "That works. Can we schedule a check-in for May so I know where I stand?" Her manager agreed. When May came around, Danielle walked in with her list again, reminded her boss of the conversation, and got the raise. The follow-up is what made it happen.

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What to Do If They Say No

A no sucks. No getting around that. But a no is not the end of the conversation. It's information.

Ask why.

Not in a confrontational way. In a figuring-it-out way. "Can you help me understand what would need to change for a raise to happen?" If they can give you a clear answer, now you have a target. If they can't, that tells you something too.

Ask about other options.

If the salary budget is frozen, there might be room for:

• A shift differential or weekend premium
• Extra PTO days
• A title change (which helps your resume even if it doesn't help your paycheck right now)
• A one-time bonus
• First pick on overtime shifts
• Covering training or certification costs

Marcus is an office admin at a medical practice. He asked for a raise and got told the budget was locked until July. So he asked for two extra PTO days and approval to take a medical billing certification class on company time. He got both. When July came around, he had a new certification AND the raise conversation already on the books.

Don't burn it down.

You're allowed to be frustrated. But don't storm out, badmouth your boss, or send a passive-aggressive email. The conversation stays professional even when the answer is disappointing. You need this job. And you might need this boss's reference.

Start a quiet backup plan.

If the answer is a flat no with no path forward, that's your signal. Not to quit tomorrow. To start looking. Update your resume. Check job boards on your lunch break. See what's out there.

Sometimes the best raise you'll ever get is from a new employer.

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The Biggest Mistakes People Make When Asking for a Raise

Comparing yourself to a coworker. "But Tyler makes more than me" puts your boss in a weird spot and shifts the conversation away from YOUR value. Keep it about what you bring to the table.

Talking about your bills. Your rent going up is real. But "I need more money because my expenses are higher" is not a raise argument. It's a personal finance problem. Your boss isn't going to fix that. Make the case based on your work, not your budget.

Apologizing before you even start. "Sorry to bother you" and "I know this is awkward" set the tone that you're doing something wrong. You're not. You're having a normal conversation about your pay.

Giving an ultimatum you can't back up. "Give me a raise or I'm leaving" only works if you actually have another offer. Otherwise, you've put yourself in a corner.

Not having a number. "I'd like more money" is vague. "I'd like to move from $18 to $20 an hour" is a conversation. Have a number. Back it up with the market data.

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Frequently Asked Questions

How do you ask for a raise without sounding greedy?

Focus on what you've done, not what you need. Walk in with specific examples: projects you completed, extra shifts you covered, responsibilities that grew. Say something like: "I've taken on X, Y, and Z over the past year, and I'd like to talk about adjusting my pay to reflect that." When you tie the ask to your contributions instead of your bills, it doesn't come across as greedy. It comes across as fair.

When is the best time to ask for a raise?

After a visible win is ideal. You finished a project, got great feedback from a customer, or stepped up when someone left. Annual reviews and budget planning periods (usually Q4 or Q1) are also solid windows. Avoid asking during layoffs, after your boss gets bad news, or on a day when the whole place is falling apart. You want your boss calm, not cornered.

What to say when your boss says there's no budget for a raise?

Don't argue, and don't walk out defeated. Say: "I understand. Can we set a date to revisit this, and can you tell me specifically what would need to happen for a raise to be possible?" This keeps the door open and puts the ball in their court. You can also ask about non-salary options like extra PTO, a title bump, or a one-time bonus. Sometimes the budget is real. Sometimes it's an excuse. Either way, pinning down a timeline protects you.

How much of a raise should I ask for?

Between 5% and 15% is the standard range. If you've been doing the same role at the same level, 5% to 7% is reasonable. If your responsibilities grew a lot or you're making well below market rate, 10% to 15% is fair. Look up what your role pays on Indeed, Glassdoor, or the Bureau of Labor Statistics so you have a number to point to. A specific ask backed by data is always stronger than "I want more."

Can I get fired for asking for a raise?

Legally, no. Asking for a raise is not a fireable offense. Most managers have had this conversation plenty of times and won't hold a respectful request against you. If your boss retaliates for you asking, that tells you everything you need to know about that workplace. Keep the conversation professional, bring your evidence, and never bluff an ultimatum unless you really do have another option lined up.

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About the Author

The Words for That helps people handle the hard conversations at work, at home, and everywhere in between. No therapy jargon. No corporate nonsense. The exact words for the situations you're actually in. Learn more about us.

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Last updated: February 26, 2026